What can I say about so called "resort" compared to other places in the keys it's great (I think), but compared to other resorts it's a 2 star and that's stretching it . As we arrived we were attacked by a swarm of mosquitoes and as a door man informed me , he doesn't get bitten, well I guess we are sweeter in taste . As I asked if they have mosquito repellent in the "gift shop" ? He didn't know . By the way , the door man should know EVERYTHING about the hotel , he is the face of the hotel , so far the incompetent training of the staff didn't fill me with confidence. But maybe it will be better . (It didn't ) The lobby is dim but smelled nice, a huge contrast to the STENCH of SARGASM seaweed that was blooming all over the place , so no ocean swim for us . Took a while to locate said "bellhop", as we loaded our bags on to the trolley that my husband went and found , he appeared to help us. Parking : you can park for $50 valet or self across the street for $45 . So as we proceeded to our room on top floor and there is only one elevator and it was slow and no fan or AC in it and its 96 degrees outside, soooo OVEN. The corridors are typical. The room isn't female friendly, the adapters on the window side of the room didn't work , there is a coffee maker and coffee is low quality so bring your own pods . There is a fridge and a huge safe ,if you are asking why that big , I have no clue ?! You have to pay for TV channels so good luck. No vanity no mirror nowhere to sit, there is however a stem iron , not like we needed it , the humidity will take the wrinkles out just ride in the elevator for a minute and boom no wrinkles and you will loose 5 lb at the same time. There are no shelves in the bathroom for your stuff or in shower, and barely any counter space. The door to the shower is weird and opens outward blocking a toiled. There is no step up in the shower so you have to be d all the way down to shave your legs and did I mention THERE ARE NO Shelves or hooks in the shower for your loofahs, sponges , shampoo and other bottles that we women need ! The stuff that's provided by the hotel is in a nice bottle but what's inside isn't that product. The water pressure was horrible and there isn't any cold water coming out, it was tepid , there is no lining in the garbage can and THERE IS ONLY ONE GARBAGE CAN in the whole room , who ever designed the place needs to be fired It's a HILTON RESORT WHAT HAPPENED!?? Does Paris Hilton know what's happening?
The beds have only ONE table in the middle so I guess only one of you needs the table for glasses and phones , lotion ..ets. By the way $670 and up doesn't include ANYTHING else. The restaurant is overpriced and a joke . Key lime pie is not worth it the $15 price for a tiny piece. The food is mediocre at best . The staff is rude and obnoxious, no one is saying hello or even paying attention. If you ask a question no one knows what's going on . I went to Breakfast no one gave directions there are no signs anywhere , if you are a first timer like we were be ready to be looked down on , I see that all of the weight staff just standing by the "Hostess podium" on their cellphones laughing about something , as I asked about breakfast the attitude was palpable I almost apologized for disturbing their tick tock scrolling, as we were seated and "your waiter will be with you " FIRST TIME AT THAT Resort and no direction was given, they promised a gluten free menu that they said had , and they didn't bring it ! My child had to go find a waiter to ask about the gluten free menu. The male waiter finally came and of course he didn't know anything and the condescending tone that he used was beyond disrespectful, so I guess good luck to us , he was shaking so bad he spilled water not only on the table but my chair as well was he detoxing I have no clue . By the way the buffet was $40 for undercooked bacon and scrambled "eggs" from a bag and some pastries and cereal , there was an omelet station but the line was long and I want to live and it was sunshine outside ! DID I MENTION THE STENCH from seaweed that no one cleaned on the beach ? We ate what we could from the buffet and we left the disgusting fruit platter that we got as a gluten free meal with what seemed to be SOUR and spoiled everything. We decided our health is worth more that $25 they billed for it. We sat there waiting for the check ! Finally had to go find the waiter AGAIN!!!!!!!! By the way BRING YOUR OWN FOOD! The gift shop HOLEY COW the prices and the nerve and balls to put A TIP on the screen was beyond obnoxious, we went picked out the stuff we needed and they HAD THE NERVE TO ASK FOR A TIP!!!!!!! The rude cashier who was on her phone not even looking up while she scanned a $16 sandwich and God knows how much I paid for a brush ($60) there were no prices anywhere!!!!! So she might have scammed us ! Don't know ! Live and Learn
So we decided to go to the pool ,the only pleasant staff member was Damien. He was so friendly and helpful us find our seats and was very attentive he was the only one that was smiling and actually asking if we needed anything. He needs a raise or I'll tell RC to give him a job . I don't even know how he is working with all those stuck up people . If it wasn't for him this resort would have one star just for the view but God made that so technically draw your own conclusions. The pool was shalow 3-4 feet so you will have to squat the whole time and the water was WARM in 100 degree heat you want cool water not soup . Flakes of something were floating in the water , I've seen an old guy with fungal infection in his folds (under arms , elbows ..ets) get out of the pool , I hope the water or what ever is in it .(Not chlorine) Would disinfect it a bit! The area if full of wild life , chickens , pigeon, and iguanas so watch your step (poop) everywhere . But we had fun watching them . I can overlook a lot of things, but the rude , dismissive, obnoxious behavior from staff I can't.
They have a job to help us to have a relaxing time not make us feel that we are bothering them ! Or first time at that resort and I am going back to cruising, your resort not worth the drive
BR
EE